This is a guide to all of the sketches and most of the music from Chris Morris' Blue Jam. I couldn't identify all of the music, though, so if anybody can help me with that, do tell me. Also available: more on the bizarre jingles, and some letters from Chris Morris' Radio 1 music show.
NB: Music is listed with the artist before the title. Some of the unknown music is identified by lyrics or references. If you can help me out with names, then please do so.
The transcripts are no substitute for the real thing, but they are quicker to download...
Intro: sad/angry/layby/jumper
Monologue: Gun
Barry Adamson - Something Wicked This Way Comes
Doctor: Kiss it better I
Doctor: Kiss it better II
Doctor: Kiss it better III
Serge Gainsbourg & Brigitte Bardot - Bonnie And Clyde Steve Lamacq
Baby fights
The Eels - Beautiful Freak
Interview: Complaint
Baby Fox - Rain
R1 Newsbeat
Jo Whiley
Doctor: Kiss it better IV
Björk - Isobel
Ivor Cutler's Disposition
Talking Heads - Finite = Alright
Dropping Tony
Giant Simon Mayo Massive Attack - Be Thankful For What You've Got
Doctor: No throat
Stereolab - Cybele's Reverie Outro: sad/angry/layby/jumper Peter Ivers - In Heaven (the lady in the radiator song) R.E.M. - Tongue
Intro: cupboard/retched/absurd
Doctor: Bad joke I
The Cardigans - Celia Inside
Transplants I
Transplants II
Giant Simon Mayo
Monologue: Art I
Coco & the Bean - Versus the 90s
Acupuncture
Bernie Taupin premonition
Sly & Family Stone - Babies Making Babies Mary Anne Hobbs: bag of lymph
Fussy newsreader
Monged sex I
Monologue: Art II
The Alessi Brothers - Oh Lori Steve Lamacq
Doctor: Bad joke II
music Outro: cupboard/retched/absurd
Intro: clothes/lobtoast/parking/west
Pay rise I
Baby Fox - In Your Dreams
Doctor: Wrong leg
Mark Radcliffe memorial
Builder's healing powers
Morcheeba - Never An Easy Way
Doctor: Abusive
Spearhead - People In Tha Middle Steve Lamacq
Monologue: Crime
Moodswings - The Great Sound Of Letting Go
Pay rise II
music: a rather jolly one with weirded voice
DIY robbery
Ambisonic - Helicopter Kinda Girl Giant Simon Mayo
Uncaring: Abduction
Dubstar - Stars Outro: clothes/lobtoast/parking/west
Intro: inside/fly/cackamuffin
Doctor: Phone diagnosis
The Chemical Brothers - Setting Sun Steve Lamacq
Irate motorist
Moloko - Day for Night
Pop manager
Monologue: Elephant
music: give me your love Jo Whiley
Michael Alexander St John's dance chart
John Lennon - Number 9 Dream
Stomach robbery
Finley Quaye - Even After All
Mr Bentham: Directory enquiries
Björk - Jóga Mary Anne Hobbs: bag of lymph
Eviction by slices
William Orbit - Story of Light
Psychiatric sex
Michael Alexander St John's mistake
Outro: inside/fly/cackamuffin Beth Orton - Best Bit
Intro: simplespeak/brains/rage/bulb
Ping pong
music Steve Lamacq
Doctor: Distractingly ugly
Morcheeba - Moog Island
Lawyer I
Monologue: Acting
Monged Sex II
Beck - Beercan Mark Radcliffe memorial
Newsagent
The Velvet Underground - I'll Be Your Mirror
Child line
Portishead - Sour Times
Interview: Andrew Morton
Olive - Miracle
Lawyer II
Lawyer III
The Divine Comedy - Ten Seconds To Midnight Outro: simplespeak/brains/rage/bulb
Interview: Andrew Morton (reprise)
Intro: footsack/infect/turnip/cessjophy
Transplants III
Everything But The Girl - Missing
Doctor: You don't like me
Baby Fox - Curlylocks
Doctor: Bribery I
Archbishop lead-in music
Archbishop
fade in episode 1
Intro: footsack/infect/turnip/cessjophy
Transplants III
Everything but the girl - Missing
Doctor: You don't like me
Baby Fox - Curlylocks
Doctor: Bribery I
Archbishop lead-in music Mary Anne Hobbs: wheeled on a trolley
Monologue: Belt
Moloko - Party Weirdo Mary Anne Hobbs: bag of lymph
Irate robbery
The Cardigans - Beautiful One Steve Lamacq
Uncaring: Fire
Sneaker Pimps - 6 Underground
Unemployed Welshmen I
Ben Harper - Mama's Trippin' Jo Whiley
Pub millionairess
Opus III - It's A Fine Day
Doctor: Bribery II
Outro: footsack/infect/turnip/cessjophy Big Star - If You's A Viper
Intro: coins/chomped/bomb
Oral hygiene
music Simon Mayo in a ditch
Doctor: Wanger
Morcheeba - Blindfold
Monologue: Suicide
music: foreign sounding Zoë Ball
Michael Alexander St John's club scene
Air - Sexy Boy
Kiddy mafia I
Jim White - Still Waters Steve Lamacq
Mr Lizard
Pulp - Dishes Outro: coins/chomped/bomb
Intro: daft/concrete/feigning
Doctor: Squeamish
Happy Mondays - Loose Fit Mary Anne Hobbs: wheeled on a trolley
Kiddy Mafia II
music - nobody is perfect
Off-licence
Beck - Jack-Ass
Mr Bentham: Pockets
Ambisonic - Mobilized
Doctor: Heroin
Serge Gainsbourg & Brigitte Bardot - Initials BB Giant Simon Mayo
Diving helmet full of bees
Morcheeba - The Sea
Nicholas Parsons
Mark Radcliffe memorial
Resurrection
Moloko - Fun For Me Intro: daft/concrete/feigning
Intro: scream/strangers/train/dialling
Mr Cocky
Imagination - Body Talk Simon Mayo in a ditch (reprise)
Unnecessary operations
Air - You Make It Easy
Monologue: Rothko
Madonna - Ray of Light Mark Goodier lying on the floor
The Gush
music
Doctor: Clothing issues
music: future shock
Too good
Coldcut - Autumn Leaves Kevin Greening
Transplants IV
Outro: scream/strangers/train/dialling
Intro: slaver/whirlwind/switch
Swim with the fish
Massive Attack - Black Milk
Criminal disguises I
Zoo suicide
music Kevin Greening
Doctor: Fight
Spearhead - Tha Payroll Steve Lamacq
Unemployed Welshmen II
Morcheeba - Fear And Love
Telephone inaccuracies
R.E.M. - Tongue
Monged Sex III
Björk - Unravel
Symptomless coma
Outro: slaver/whirlwind/switch
Intro: down/slap/junk/gasp
Enforced insecurity
Guns N' Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine Mary Anne Hobbs: wheeled on a trolley
Uncaring: Lions
Air - Remember
Criminal disguises II
Living outside
The Cardigans - Great Divide Mark Radcliffe memorial
Interview: Jerry Springer
The Eels - Flower Steve Lamacq
The thing in the sky
Massive Attack - Unfinished Sympathy Kevin Greening
Doctor: Errands
Dubstar - Just A Girl She Said
The giant next door
The Red Hot Chili Peppers - If You Want Me To Stay
Birdsong
Outro: down/slap/junk/gasp They Might Be Giants - Spiraling Shape
SERIES 3
Episode 1 - package holiday
Intro: prating/scratchhead
Welsh foreplay
Plone - Plock Mary Anne Hobbs: wheeled on a trolley
Competitive parenting
Tricky & Alison Goldtrapp - Pumpkin
Monologue: Journalism
Mercury Rev - Holes Mark Goodier's baby
Doctor: Family history
4 Hero - Star Chasers
In his father's shadow
Beck - Tropicalia Simon Mayo in the basement
Urine transfusions
Mono - Disney Town
Doctor: Hiding away
Mr Scruff - Fish Outro: prating/scratchhead
Daddy loves you
Episode 2 - aaoohmmhaah
Intro: boz-boz/snails/mangled
Kidnap press conference
Massive Attack - Teardrop
Invited assault
Esthero - That Girl
Sandwich bar I
Sandwich bar II
Giant Simon Mayo
Doctor: Blindfolded
Mica - Carefree
Michael Alexander St John's dance news
Mary Anne Hobbs: bag of lymph The Egg - Getting Away With It
Kiddy mafia III
Moloko - Caught In A Whisper Chris Moyles's suicide
Fixing the baby
Tipsy - Space Golf
Lunchtime masochism
Lambchop - The Saturday Option Outro: boz-boz/snails/mangled
Episode 3 - costrinzi
Intro: queue/drivel/brum
Doctor: Billy Connolly
The Eels - 3 Speed Zoë Ball
Zombie baby
Herbert - So Now
Monologue: Playwright
Beck - We Live Again Kevin Greening
Raspberry conversation
Serge Gainsbourg & Brigitte Bardot - Un Jour Comme Un Autre
Conversation starter
The Passions - I'm In Love With A German Film Star Mark Goodier bloated
Small Hoover
P J Harvey - The Wind Steve Lamacq
Possessed by Beethoven
Kristin Hersh - What'll we do with the baby-o Outro: queue/drivel/brum
Episode 4 - complusian bedgely
Intro: wrongo/ball/ratatouille
Doctor: Hammer comparison
Scritti Politti - The Sweetest Girl Mark Goodier's baby
Commuter's bottom
Moloko - Flipside
The house wheel
Mercury Rev - Tonite It Shows Simon Mayo in the basement
Pro-thick Agency
Jon Spencer Blues Explosion - Lovin' Machine
Open abdominal therapy
Doris - Did You Give The World Some Love Today? Steve Lamacq
Unemployed Welshmen III
Sweet Harmony - Sweet Harmony
Doctor: HIV results I
Broadcast - Booklovers
Doctor: HIV results II
Outro: wrongo/ball/ratatouille
Episode 5 - al trang un sabis
Intro: corelli/tuneful/dribble
Adulterous rapist
Madder Rose - My Star
Gone feral
Beck - Dead Melodies
Monologue: Marriage
Dramatics - What U See/Get Mark Goodier lying on the floor
Doctor: Phone sex
The Orb - Little Fluffy Clouds
Michael Alexander St John's list of cool
Red Snapper - Seeing Red Chris Moyles' suicide
Mr Bentham: Wallet
Sons Of Silence - A Grain Of Sand
Homophobic lesbians
Jah Fair & Yo La Tengo - The Helpful Monkey Wallpapers Entire Home Outro: corelli/tuneful/dribble
Episode 6 - huxtapaz
Intro: whistle/crime/pigs/dog
Wheelchair kidnap
Beta Band - Inner Meet Me
City jumper I
Doctor: Pinhead dwarf
Underworld - Bruce Lee Mark Goodier bloated
Gradual suicide
Monged sex IV
The Roots - You Got Me
Guillotine art
Black Star Liner - Superfly And Bindi Kevin Greening
David Bowie hosts
P J Harvey - The River
Idiot Siege
Mr Bentham: Car parking
The Cardigans - Erase And Rewind
City jumper II
Insensitive policeman
Aphex Twin - Windowlicker
Horse music
Outro: whistle/crime/pigs/dog
